I'm reading a magazine. Actually reading is incorrect as there are no words in the magazine. I assume the entire contents are full page splash advertisements. Most of the advertisements are for cigarettes or TV shows. I find that both are working on me, but in different ways.
In the past three years I have only bought one pack of cigarettes, but the desire is constantly inside me, the advertisements are whipping the desire into a frenzy. I could sneak out and buy cigarettes without anyone knowing, but I'd feel guilty deceiving my friends, plus what if one of them caught me. That would be terrible. I reach down into my backpack and look for some cigarettes, just in case I'd forgotten about some I'd stashed away in a corner or something. I knew I wouldn't find any, it had been at least six months since I'd had a physical pack on me, but there they were. Five cigarettes in a crumpled box, relatively undamaged. The urge to smoke was like the urge to procreate, a raw, primal instinct that demanded to be satisfied. Just as overwhelming was the sense of debasement. "How could I be so weak to harm myself in such a way? Did I have any self-control at all?" I couldn't find a lighter, so with mixed feelings I turned back to the magazine.
One particular actress appeared in several advertisements. She was a supporting actress in a very popular show about Vampires. The show was so popular because they used real vampires. She wasn't a vampire, but I considered her the character with the most influence. She was strong and independent and stood up for her rights and human rights, but she also stood up for vampire rights and often acted as a mediator between humans and vampires. Physically, she was fit, she would definitely be in the top three best looking woman in a room, depending on the room. She could have been a part time model. However, the photographer was skilled, and I'm a sucker for muted color photography --The red blood standing out on the vampires, of course -- and she became a dream.
I could feel the softness of her lips as I explored with shocked fingers. Her breath was hot and sweet, as if she had just drank a soda. We hugged and I could feel her hair catching in my beard, feel her hands press into my back. What a thrill to be in her embrace! What a treat to look into her eyes and see them looking into mine. To think my eyes could be as perplexing as hers! Such absurdity! It was nice to be close to her. I'm suddenly aware of how wonder this must look to outside observers. Myself practically blending into my preternaturally white suit, and her contrasting sharply with her similarly white garments. What a lovely juxtaposition. Serenity washes over me, and I am at peace.
